
Quiz – 📚 Library 💑 Lovers 🌞 Day (Submit answers by Fri 21 Feb)
Happy Library Lovers Day for 2025. While health libraries are usually stuck with displays of “Hurst’s the heart” , this year something a little extra. A quiz, of sorts, from Health Libraries Australia.
Below are nine appalling arrogations of famous love poems or love songs. Simply identify the original poet or songwriter. Email your answers to Daniel.mcdonald@health.qld.gov.au (the appalling arrogater). You can have until COB Friday 21 Feb.
Respondents that get at least a few right will be put into a draw to win a hardcopy of the Lonely Planet book “Hidden Libraries: the world’s most unusual book depositories”
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1.
Shall I compare the library to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more air-conditioned.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And your loans can be renewed to a better date;
Sometime too hot the eye of misinformation shines,
And often searching is very complicated;
And full-text authentication sometimes declines,
By chance, or predatory publishers untrimm’d;
But thy eternal library shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of clean and clear information that fair thou ow’st;
Nor shall death brag with Palliative Medicine MeSH terms,
When in eternal lines a medline search grow’st.
So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see,
Love your hospital library, because your hospital library loves thee.
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2.
At last, my loan has been returned
My long-overdue days are over
And I’m back on the shelf
At last, I can be borrowed again
My heart was wrapped up in patient records
But now I’ve been returned
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3.
If I should stay
I would only be in Musk’s way
So I’ll go, but I know
I’ll think of you every step of the way
And I will always love MeSH
I will always love MeSH
Bittersweet memories
That is all I’m taking with me
So goodbye, please don’t cry
We both know AI is what you, you need
And I will always love MeSH
I will always love MeSH
And I hope DOGE treats you kind
And I hope you have all RFK Jnr dreamed of
And I wish you joy and happiness
But above all this, I wish you kept MeSH
And I will always love MeSH
I will always love MeSH
I will always love MeSH
I will always love MeSH
I will always love MeSH
I, I will always love MeSH
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4.
Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy signing the contract
Told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was business, and it’s an ache I still remember
You can get addicted to a certain kind of resource
Like resignation to the end, always the end
So when we found out that we could not make expenses
Well, you said that we would still be friends
But I’ll admit that I was glad it was over
But you didn’t have to cut my archive access
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
And I don’t even need your package
But you treat me like a stranger, and that feels so rough
No, you didn’t have to stoop so low
Have your friends keep the backruns and then change the ISSN
I guess that I don’t need that, though
Now you’re just a vendor that I used to know
Now you’re just a vendor that I used to know
Now you’re just a vendor that I used to know
Now and then I think of all the times you upped your prices
But had me believing it was always my budget to increase
And I don’t wanna live that way
Reading into every multi-year deal that you offer
You said that you could let it go
And I wouldn’t catch you hung up on a client that you used to know
Now you’re just a vendor that I used to know
Now you’re just a vendor that I used to know
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5.
‘Tis better to have borrowed a library book and lost it, than never to have borrowed at all
Who are wise in love, love most, say least… which is excellent behaviour in the library
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6.
Like a fool I went and searched the catalogue
Now I’m wondering if the book is on the shelf
Oo baby, here I am, signed, sealed, delivered, I’m yours
Then that time I went and requested an ILL
Now I’m back and not ashamed to cry
Oo baby, here I am, signed, sealed, delivered, I’m yours
I’ve done a lot of foolish things
That I really didn’t mean, didn’t I?
Seen a lot of things in this old world
But ordering an ILL is such a help
Here I am baby
Signed, sealed, delivered, I’m yours
(You got my future in your pages)
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7.
It’s been seven hours and fifteen days
Since u took UpToDate away
I work every night and sleep all day
Since you took UpToDate away
I can search whatever I choose
I can get my information from an AI chatbot
But nothing
I said nothing can answer these clinical questions
‘Cause nothing compares
Nothing compares to UpToDate
It’s been so lonely without you here
Like a tiktok without a song
Nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling
Tell me baby where did my budget go
I could put my topic into every searchbox I see
But they’d only remind me of you
I went to the director and guess what he told me
Guess what he told me
He said girl point-of-care tools are all the same
No matter what you do
But he’s a fool
‘Cause nothing compares
Nothing compares to UpToDate
All the junior doctors
In the ED
All struggled when you went away
I know that paying for you was sometimes hard
But I’m willing to give it another try
Nothing compares
Nothing compares to UpToDate
Nothing compares
Nothing compares to UpToDate
Nothing compares
Nothing compares to UpToDate
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8.
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
Of your shelves, and when connecting to databases remotely
For the ends of being and ideal grace
I love thee for your 24/7 access
Most quiet need, by sun and flourescent-light.
I love thee for your open access, as men strive for right.
I love thee purely, as you fill all my doc-del requests.
I love thee with the passion put to use
For my search requests, and with my book purchase suggestions.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
When trying Chat GPT. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee when you restore my lost Endnote library.
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9.
They call me a systematic review
But my name is a scoping review
Why they call me it I do not know
For my name is a scoping review
From the first day I filled in PICO I knew scoping was the one
As I stared at the terms and smiled
For the question was opaque
And no meta-analysis was needed
When I knocked on the librarians door and entered the room
My trembling subsided in her sure advice
It was my first literature review, and with a careful hand
She taught me how pubmed works
They call me a systematic review
But my name is a scoping review
Why they call me it I do not know
For my name is a scoping review
On the second day I translated the search
To several more databases with only a little sorrow
I nodded my head, as I tapped at the laptop
She said “If I show you covidence will you follow?”
They call me a systematic review
But my name is a scoping review
Why they call me it I do not know
For my name is a scoping review
On the third day she took me to Endnote
She showed me how to de-duplicate
And the last thing I heard was a muttered word
As she stood editing the APA 7 template
On the last day I wrote up the PRISMA flow diagram
And submitted to a peer-reviewed journal
As I bid her goodbye, I said “All beauty must die”
And did not include the librarian as an author
They call me a systematic review
But my name is a scoping review
Why they call me it I do not know
For my name is a scoping review